lizziemcganja:

friend: i’m getting mcdonalds you want anything?

me: i don’t have money

friend: it’s all good, i’ll pay

me:

image

image

victory-sashes:

FUCK I JUST SPAT OUT MY FUCKING RAMEN

snatchedweaves:

That look ur mom gives u when u embarrass her in public but she can’t kill u yet

image

proctalgia:

when u try to tell ur friends a pun

image

inksplattersandearlyhours:

"Fred Potter, I actually let your mother name you after the bravest man she knew, instead of making it all about me. Now promise me that you’ll take a picture of McGonagall’s face when she realises the prankster legacy you and James plan to live up to. Awesome. High five.”

yeahwriters:

dukeofbookingham:

principalcellist:

sara-the-dork:

i-havent-been-the-same-since-i:

caz-tiel:

hothaute:

Imagine you’re like in a party and somebody tells you “somebody died fast we need to go to the funeral” and you’re just like

what the fuck kind of scenario is that

a gatsby party

TOO SOON

THE BOOKS BEEN OUT SINCE 1925 YOU ABSOLUTE PANCAKE

…pancake

Mm pancakes…

Hugh Laurie - a guidebook (insp x)

rainsfell:

how do i get over someone who i never dated